Black Sheep

Hiding behind masks, makeup and fake personas trying to act like you’re the real deal. Inflicting pain through their own projecting and criticizing. Expecting you to be strong enough to handle it every time, with every blow that chips away at your soul leaving you helpless and vulnerable to those who prey. They sit back and watch you deteriorate from your true self not given a helping hand or any support. Then passing all that judgment they feel so inclined to do to avoid it’s reflection. Branding you and not letting you fit in anywhere. Constantly on your back, up your butt and in your face about what they only think they know, what they never knew.

Isn’t it weird how people talk trash about you, when the only thing they actually know about you is your name.

That life you live and wake up to everyday. That person you see in the mirror that represents your being. That reputation you earned or that was put upon you without permission. That persona you created to make it through the tough moments and get over those barriers they sometimes make unbearable obstacles. That generational dysfunction that’s passed down for too long without ceasing. The memories we try to move on from and they can’t seem to forget. The temporary mistakes they try to make permanent. That level that was achieved yet never acknowledged. We don’t have to be forced to remain where they put us to appease our audience. These fans of misery, negative energy and rejection.

Nothing annoys me more than when someone expects you to be okay with something that they wouldn’t be okay with if you do it.

After every failed relationship there’s judgment. Sometimes it’s not meant to be no matter how hard we try to make it work. They think they know what’s best for us when their lives aren’t reflecting perfection itself. Watching from the outside assuming they have a position within the company, establishment and kingdom you built. It benefits them to do nothing and then reap the results. Non-stop drama seems to add to the situation which further outweighs the goal of trying to prove people wrong. But we know they’re wrong!

Drama does not just walk into your life. Either you create it, invite it, or associate with it.

They try to detect a pattern with you in which to justify their opinion of you. Yes I attracted nothing but assholes like a magnet and with my man’s chicks, each worse than the last with the poor dumb life choices and bad family dynamics. But that’s not something we choose especially if we really didn’t choose those people. They chose us and the ONLY choice we made was to give them a chance to show us they were worth our time. When you finally raise your standards and force the potentials to try to rise to them, you truly see who is meant to be and who was only meant to be a life lesson…..never again! Because some people are marriage material and some are just mattress material. Believe it there will be someone who will love the parts of you that no one else knew how to.

Attract what you expect, reflect what you desire, become what you respect, mirror what you admire.

This holds true with friendships as well. If they aren’t showing you they deserve the title please stop listening to their excuses for demanding it. Actions speak way louder than words and you are the company you keep. Keep good company! They can’t hold you to that momentary lapse in judgment, that moment of settling, that desperate attempt at false happiness and blind love. We all had them yet we all aren’t still suffering the consequences. Only a few of us that didn’t abide by the masses have learned not to repeat the trauma. Live and learn!

Again we didn’t choose this life, this path, this journey. There’s a method to the madness but only God knows exactly why. For some reason they believe they too have the right to judge, change, manipulate and control our lives. After 20 years in the making with 30 years of friendship and almost a year in love apparently there were many lessons we each had to learn so that we could be the right people for each other at the right time. We had been forcing things for too long with the wrong people so God made this love easy with the right person. We were focused on the outsiders that pretended to appreciate us and our love but in reality were jealous enough to try to interfere in our relationship, try to destroy what they couldn’t have while with us.

If God wants you to be with someone, he’ll make it happen at the right time and with the right person. Don’t force it!

Trust me all the lessons I’ve learned from the mistakes I’ve made, I now know a good man when I see one. I know how girls perform verses how a woman presents herself. A little girl seeks revenge. A real woman moves on while karma does the work. I know the difference because I’m different and no one can tell or advise me on my own experience. I can now write the book, teach the class and go on tour thank you very much. Don’t be mad that “baby something” title didn’t equal to gf/bf or spouse. That’s the position you earned and the lane you need to stay in. Don’t hate because your significant other complains about you and mine raves about me. Or that you weren’t good enough to bring out the King or Queen in them while they were with you but someone like me is about that life.

Build a friendship before marrying someone. Marry your bestfriend.

You hate on us because you desire to be us. We aren’t outsiders or black sheep. We’re too much for you to handle because you weren’t meant to handle us. We don’t need your validation, recognition, advice or attention. Some people create their own storms, then get upset when it rains. When something bad happens you have three choices. You can either let it define you, let it destroy you, or you can let it strengthen you. I won’t apologize for evolving past your comfort zone. But we won’t stress ourselves over people who don’t deserve to be part of our lives. Nobodies don’t have the right to come for somebody’s!